Honey, how are the scones? Any good?
I don't think I had the right kind of cream.
Bay, Earth to Bay.
I'm sorry. What did you say?
How are the scones?
They're good, though I think I like your blueberry better.
Good morning.
Hey, Dad, did you hear Brad Murrow signed with the Jayhawks?
Really? How'd they get him away from Syracuse?
Probably his jump shot. Oh!
Hey! All right, you guys, hurry up.
Have a good day. Bye.
Bye, honey, I love you. I love you too.
[Toby] Hurry up, Bay.
♪ When we were young ♪
♪ And is it right for me to wait ♪
♪ To tell you now, to tell you now ♪
So what are you and Dad doing for your anniversary?
He's surprising me with tickets to the Ray Barretto Tribute.
Doesn't sound like much of a surprise.
He doesn't know that I know. And you, Daphne Paloma Vasquez,
are not gonna tell him.
♪ So I've been trying hard to find ♪
♪ Been searching for some peace of mind ♪
♪ But I don't have the time ♪
♪ She sucked it from me ♪
What is it?
That girl won't stop staring.
♪ Like you did me ♪
Well let's give her something to stare at.
♪ And is it right for me to wait ♪
♪ To tell you now, to tell you now♪
[theme music playing]
Oh... Thank you.
Last cup.
It's my first cup.
Last cup here... no more hiding out.
I was letting everybody cool down.
And I supported that.
But it's been 48 hours. It's time to go back.
I told them everything.
I don't know how else to explain it.
You're folding?
Where's the Regina Vasquez who slugged that Little League coach...
...because he wouldn't let Daphne try out?
She made that team and won them the freakin' championship.
Because you fought for her.
This is different.
I have never had my daughter hate me.
Both daughters.
[sighs] I am hiding.
That's why I'm kicking you out.
I love you. But it's time to go home.
[sighs]
Oh. Good morning.
Good morning. Are you making a cake?
Or two.
I didn't know how you wanted to celebrate.
Maybe we could just let this birthday slide.
But it's the first birthday that we'll all
be able to spend together.
We have to do something. Well, it's Bay's birthday too.
What do you normally do for her?
Usually we buy her something, which she returns for store credit.
Oh, Mom, don't worry. I won't be returning this year's gift.
Mm, and what is that gonna be?
Oh, don't act like you don't know.
She wants this Volkswagen... Thing.
It's this dune buggy...
It's an amphibious four-wheel-drive convertible.
It's a tank, but way cuter, and I can haul stuff around
without inflicting another SUV on the world.
What exactly do you need to haul?
I don't know. Stuff.
I just like the idea of a car that's so weird
they didn't know what to call it, so they just called it "The Thing."
And what makes you so sure you're going to get "The Thing", hmm?
Don't joke, please.
[cell phone ringing]
They got Toby a car for his birthday.
They have to get cars for us, too.
Us?
Your signing's gotten really good.
Do you want me to talk with her?
No. I'll take care of it.
[door opens, shuts]
What are you doing here?
Watch your tone. That is your mother you're talking to.
It's OK, Ma.
Look, I know you're mad,
but you still have to treat me with respect.
I kept my secret because I didn't want to lose you.
And I am not gonna let that happen now that it's out.
I'm gonna be late.
Thank you for taking over the past couple of days.
No problem.
Ma?
I just can't understand why you never told me, Regina.
Because... I didn't want to be
talked out of what I decided to do.
And I didn't wanna implicate anyone else in my decision.
What did you think, Ma?
All these years Daphne growing up so blonde and blue-eyed?
I always assumed Angelo was right.
That she wasn't his. And you never asked me?
I know... that you don't understand why I did what I did,
but... I could really use an ally right now.
You have one.
Thank you.
I mean, just when I thought I'd gotten used to "Surprise!
You were switched at birth!"...
...suddenly it's "Surprise! Your mom knew all along!"
Well she feels really bad about it.
When someone's on your couch 24 hours a day, it's hard not to notice.
Are you going to tell me to forgive her?
Not gonna tell you to do anything.
And your mom? She thinks I don't have a right to be mad either?
No, we're not taking sides.
I can't believe my mom and I are on the opposites sides of a war.
Hey, what are we doing for your birthday?
The Kennishes want to have a party this weekend--for me and Bay.
It's Bay's birthday too??
Duh.
Kathryn says it will be small...
which, for her, probably means there will be a Ferris wheel.
What about getting custody of Daphne?
Oh, well, we can certainly try, but it's a lengthy process,
one that Regina will fight all the way.
It can be years before it's resolved,
and by then it's likely Daphne would be 18,
which would make it a moot point.
Daphne doesn't even want her here.
There's got to be some way to get Regina out of the house.
Well, you can evict her, but she has a legal right to take Daphne with her.
[John] There we go. Come on, now.
[groans]
How'd it go with your mom this morning?
She did what she did because she loves you.
OK, everybody. Everybody, gather round. Come on.
Here we go. Here we go.
Good, good, good...
OK, um... we are all improving.
It's great. Our rebounding is getting better.
Our passing is improving,
but we have to make sure that that translates into points on the board.
And I've also found out my new name sign...
"Hard-ass with a 'J.'"
I have no idea where that name came from.
And I'm also planning on living up to that name, all right?
So let's go out there and work on our offense, OK? Go!
Go, go, go! Goodbye, go.
The food is crap,
but luckily, that's not why I brought you here.
Then, why?
The view.
What do you think of that?
That's cool. I've seen them around.
My favorite is the girl with the axe.
Axe?
You like Axe Girl?
You?
Seriously?
What? You don't think that I
could do something that awesome?
No, I'm mean, I'm impressed.
Thank you. I've been dying to tell you.
Daphne doesn't know.
Toby doesn't know.
No one knows.
[laughs] Yeah.
OK, look.
It's the billboard near Buckner.
It's been blank for weeks.
And it just keeps calling to me,
"Bay, Bay, bomb me."
And that's what I want for my birthday.
To wake up and know that thousands of people
are driving by my... art.
They're thinking about it. They're commenting on it.
They're wondering who did it.
How are you going to get up there?
How am I going to do it?
Oh, I'm so glad that you asked.
[John] OK. Go, go, go, go, go!
Work it down. Do one, OK? Good, good, good.
Oh! Good, good, good! Hey, whoa, whoa!
Two! Two, two, two.
OK, all right, one more time. One more time.
Ladies, one more time. From here. Number two.
All right, here we go.
Good, good, good.
All right. No problem. One more, time back here.
Could you make your shots?!
Whatever, Kobe.
One more time from the top.
[grunts]
Hey! Hey, Daphne!
Sweetie, what are you doing? You can't do that.
You know what this is about? That woman's back.
That woman is her mother.
I heard you got into a fight.
No big deal.
Well, are you OK?
No, I'm not.
You come here expecting me to pretend like nothing happened?
No, I came back here so we could work it out.
If you are here, then I'm leaving.
What do you mean? I'm moving in with my real parents.
[door shuts]
I can't decide which one I want to put on the billboard.
B... A... D.
Bad? You think they're bad?
Badass... [laughing] Badass.
OK, I get it.
[door shuts]
Oh... Hi.
I feel like we've barely spoken- -I'm so happy to meet you...
...You look so much like your mother.
You, too.
Why are you here?
Oh, why am I here? Why? I'm... I'm... I'm...
I'm visiting Emmett.
I didn't know you two were friends.
Yeah. It turns out we're both into the same things...like art...
Art. I like art.
Oh, oh, oh, photos! Yes, he takes great photos.
Sounds like you've become good friends.
Isn't there somewhere you need to be?
Oh, you want some privacy?
"Do you want snails... food?"
Maybe you could run out and get dinner?
Oh, is Bay staying for dinner?
"Drink?" I don't know what's happening right now.
I can break out some candles... set the mood a little?
There, she's moving her hands... "Dancing around?"
Mom, we're just hanging out, Would you stop?
"Mom." I know. "Mom, I don't..." I'm confused.
Is Daphne okay with you guys "hanging out"?
"Daphne." Oh, I know Daphne.
I don't know what this means.
Funny. I don't know what "hanging out" means, either.
It can mean so many things.
I think it means you were just leaving.
Okay.
She's nice.
Hi. I can't tell if I'm hungry.
Anything good in there? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Oh!
Saltimbocca?
Oh, you're a vegetarian. Yeah.
Maybe you wanna make an exception one time.
No, not for veal. Sorry.
There's chicken parmesan...
Oh, I just made this. This is really good.
Linguini with shrimp.
Shrimp? Yes.
Yeah. I eat shrimp.
Really? Yeah.
OK, well, a big bowl or little bowl?
Big bowl. [both laugh]
So how long have you and Bay been friends?
A few weeks.
And you're able to communicate?
Her signing isn't very good.
She's getting better every day.
Just remember it takes a long time before you can really converse.
I think I'm going to sign up for speech therapy.
Did she ask you to?
No. It's my idea.
You must really like her.
We're not getting married-- just trying things out.
Is this a good idea?
Things are really complicated with Bay right now.
Or is it because she's hearing?
Actually, yes.
85% of deaf/hearing relationships don't work out.
Just because you read that on the Internet doesn't make it true.
Besides, Dad's deaf, but you're still getting divorced.
Exactly!
Relationships are hard enough. Why make things harder?
She'll learn to sign.
We'll figure it out.
Do you think she'll ever get to know you like a deaf girl could?
There's only one way to find out.
Can we just talk? Sorry, I'm a little bit busy.
Maybe we should have scheduled something...
Oh, I don't know, 13 years ago? I did try.
Hiring a private investigator to take creepy photos of me
does not count as mother-daughter bonding.
OK, OK...
One time, I snuck into your piano recital when you were seven.
During the intermission, you were trying to get a drink of water
from the water fountain, but it was too high.
I asked you if you needed help.
I gave you a boost.
You were so beautiful in that little blue dress.
With the butterflies and the big sash.
Yeah, I wanted to just grab you and take you home.
But Kathryn came, and she took you back inside.
It was so hard for me to watch you go,
but I was not gonna tear you away from your family.
Or you took one look at me and didn't want me.
Of course.
Of course I wanted you.
It was just too painful to be around you knowing
that you could never be mine.
Painful for you? What about me?
[voice trembling] My whole life I felt like I didn't belong.
And I didn't know why and I thought it was my fault.
It wasn't your fault. It was mine.
No! You don't get to do this.
[knocking on door]
Hi. Hi.
I wanted to talk to you about the girls' birthday.
Can I come in? Sure.
OK, I know how awkward this is,
and I was hoping that we could just
push past it so we could celebrate Daphne and Bay's birthday.
I'm not really sure what we're gonna be doing.
Well, I mean, a cake at least. Or should we do two?
I know that Daphne loves red velvet.
Like I said, I'm not really sure, but...
Kathryn, I know you.
What do you have planned?
Cake, presents, family. I believe I qualify.
I'm not the one who got us here.
Regina, you did.
And if it were up to me, I'd be willing to push past it...
...for the sake of the girls.
But it's not me who doesn't want you here.
It's... Bay.
And Daphne.
Finished, honey?
Thank you. Thanks.
Oh, you're finally here. Good morning, honey.
[Bay groans]
So, girls, how we doing?
No fevers? No sore throats?
No. [Daphne] No.
Really?
I wouldn't say that if someone from Buckner or Carlton calls,
'cause I just told them that you're both sick.
We're going car shopping. Whoo-hoo!
Oh, Mom, don't do that.
You're speechless. That's OK. You don't need to say anything.
All you need to say is, "thank you," and think about
what you want your vanity plate to say.
You guys have done so much for me already.
We want to do this for you.
We got a lot of birthdays to catch up on.
It's OK. I'll work on her. Hey...
Let's get you dressed for car shopping.
Your new front wheel drive chariot awaits.
I'm sick too, right? Honey, you already have a car.
Hurry up, it's time for school. Move it.
[squealing]
Oh! What's that?
Oh, you wanna come home with me? OK.
Honey, can we get something that's younger than you are?
It was designed for the military, and it's kinda cute.
In an ugly baby sort of way. Mm-hm.
Come on, honey, it's what she really wants.
Like I'm gonna say no.
You guys are gonna thank me if we ever get invaded by Arkansas.
OK, Daphne, what about this one? It's not too fancy.
This could be your Daphnemobile.
You don't have to call it "Daphnemobile."
It's... It's nice.
Let's see. It's got low mileage and good safety features.
You know, I really appreciate this, but... I just don't need a car.
When I was your age, I would have killed to have a car.
Honey, we wanna do this for you.
You're gonna save them a bundle on the audio package.
[cracks up]
[Toby whistles]
Looks like we're gonna need some more garage.
Or a full-time valet. What the hell is this?
Melody said you weren't in school and now I know why.
[John] It's a gift, Regina. Oh, this is going back.
No, it's not going back.
You knew about this and you didn't say anything?
It's not a secret.
Raising someone else's child, that's a secret. This is a gift.
[Regina] I should have known about this.
Can we just calm down? OK, the car stays.
If you don't like it, you can go.
Stop! Please! If I go, she goes.
Oh, that's so nice, threatening us on our daughters' birthday.
You're making decisions... Forget it, I'll just take it back.
You want her to ride on a motorcycle?
We bought them a birthday present!
[Regina] My choice, my daughter.
[all exclaim]
Daphne.
Daph...
I just wanted to see how you're doing. I'm fine.
Are you sure? I said I'm fine.
OK.
[door shuts]
OK, now trust me.
I know that she's in a bad place,
but there's never gonna be a good time
to tell her about us.
I know, but now is a really bad time.
I just wanna tell her before she stumbles across it herself.
Because then it's gonna look like we're hiding it,
which we kind of are.
Okay.
I'll tell her.
OK. Help me.
Just I don't know how to deal with her when she's like this.
Well, she apparently got her temper from me.
I say just let her work through it.
Well, OK, that's fine,
but it just can't be like World War III around here anymore.
Honey, it's not like we fired the first shot.
That's what my mother said about the divorce.
"He started it."
[sighs] To the kids, it doesn't matter, it's still war.
Daphne wants to be here. What are we gonna do? Throw her out?
Of course not.
But we can't let her hide out here, either.
I wanna help her.
But she doesn't need me right now.
She needs her.
[Bay] I should have gotten a partner in crime years ago.
[police siren wails]
[helicopter flying overhead] Oh!
What are you doing?
[tires squealing]
Ow!
[gasping]
You're bleeding.
So are you.
I just wanted one thing that wasn't ruined by everyone else.
Hey! There she is! There's the birthday girl.
Hey! [laughs]
I'm sorry about the whole...
Stop, right now. Cars are easy to fix.
All I want you to worry about...
...is having a happy birthday.
That was really good.
Thank you. Thank you.
Hey, Daphne, I made some peanut butter chocolate chip pancakes.
They're Bay's favorite.
We also have something for you here on the table.
It's kind of a Kennish family tradition because we do strive at all times
to be as corny as possible.
Do you want syrup or whipped cream?
Oh, um... I'm sorry.
I just don't like peanut butter.
I'll make you blueberry.
Oh, wow!
You guys are in full gear this morning, aren't you?
Good morning. Happy birthday, honey.
I made you your favorite pancakes.
Oh, thanks. I'm sorry.
They still think that I'm five.
Where's the smiley face?
Honey, what happened to your hand?
Oh, I had an unfortunate incident with the rose bushes
that I'd prefer not talk about, actually.
OK, guys, I think we need pictures of the birthday girls.
Yes! Dad, seriously.
We want Daphne to stay. That's fine.
No, it's not. No matter what they say, you don't have to wear the hat.
I think you have to wear the hat.
All right, ladies. There we go. [Toby] Come on, cheese!
Smile!
[John] Yeah, very nice!
I found this in the trash.
You want to tell me about this?
It's nothing.
What happened?
I fell on a sprinkler at Jackson's house playing football.
You were playing football late last night.
C'mon, we're going to be late for the party.
[knocking on door]
[Bay] Hi.
Happy Birthday!
Oh, thank you.
Happy Birthday!
Oh, thanks.
Thank you.
What happened?
Oh... oh, it's nothing. It was just me being stupid.
So I just got off the phone with the auto body place,
and they quoted me 2,700. [groans]
But I talked them down to two grand. How'd you do that?
Same way I talked you into grounding me for one month instead of two.
Good man.
So does this mean I get to keep the extra $700?
[chuckles] Don't push it.
So I guess Bay also cut herself on the sprinkler
playing football with Jackson?
You come home all cut up... what are you into...
...cutting? Rough sex?
Mom!
Tell me what's going on.
No. Because I know how you feel about Bay.
Apparently with good reason.
You start going out with her and suddenly...
...you're sneaking around...
...lying...
...and asking to go to speech therapy.
I knew it.
That's what this is really about.
I don't like who she's turning you into.
What were you guys talking about?
No, seriously, tell me.
She doesn't like me, does she?
Will?
As in, she doesn't now.
OK, here it is. The other one. [all exclaiming]
[John] Wow! That looks fantastic. Just have to light 'em.
Here. I can help you with that. Thank you.
I never missed any of Daphne's birthdays.
And I am not gonna miss any more of Bay's.
I'm not OK with this.
Honey. No. I'm sorry.
[sighs] Dad...
I want her here.
OK.
Come here.
Thank you.
The cake is delicious.
Thank you.
The trick is to not be shy with the butter.
You know what would lighten the mood? Presents.
Yeah.
Um... I...
I just... I just wanted to say something.
Sixteen years ago, I gave birth...
...to a beautiful little girl.
And I brought home... another beautiful little girl.
And even though it's hard, right now,
to make peace...
...with everything that's happened.
Tonight, I feel very lucky...
...to have two...
...incredible...
...daughters.
And all of the people...
...that come with them.
So happy birthday, baby. [John] Happy birthday, girls.
[Toby] Happy birthday. Happy birthday, sweetie.
Presents. Presents. Yeah!
"From Emmett."
It's a scarf.
Thank you.
Daphne, your turn.
[laughs]
Oh, no, you didn't!
[gasps] You did! You did! I can't believe it.
And you got Charles Dane to autograph it.
What's Deafenstein ?
It's an all-deaf version of Frankenstein done all in ASL.
[Toby] Deafenstein.
"He can't hear you scream."
[laughter] This looks terrible.
It's so bad, and the sequels are even worse.
What's that? She said we're obsessed.
How did you get Charles Dane to autograph it?
He was at a horror convention in Springfield.
That's like 150 miles away.
Remember six months ago when I told you
I couldn't go to your basketball game
'cause I was writing a paper?
That's when I did it.
That's... That's a very thoughtful gift.
Oh, hey.
Thanks again for the scarf.
It's not a scarf.
It's a blindfold? It's a blindfold.
And it's not your...
...real gift.
[down-tempo music playing]
♪ Here is a heart ♪
♪ I made it for you so take it ♪
♪ Here is a heart ♪
My art! How...
You did that?
It's perfect!
♪ No better way than I can say♪
This is badass.
♪ Been holding your hands inside of mine ♪
I'm sorry I haven't told Daphne about us yet.
It's OK.
Maybe it's better coming from me.
Can I come in?
I didn't wanna give you this in front of everybody.
It's all your favorite recipes and favorite takeout menus...
...and a couple of cereal box tops.
[cracking up] Are you kidding?
This is seriously the worst present on earth.
Cereal box tops and takeout menus?
This sucks!
I'm terrible at birthday presents, aren't I?
No wonder you didn't want to give it to me in front of everybody.
So I've been thinking about this car.
And I think you should keep it.
It's a nice, safe,
moderately-priced... for them... car.
And...
...you deserve it.
Thank you.
I miss you.
I keep wanting to forgive you
and make everything how it was before,
but you kept this huge thing from me
and every time I think about it,
I just get mad all over again.
I guess I'm just stubborn.
[exhales]
Of course you are.
You're my daughter.
[Daphne laughs]
Don't you think you could go a little easier on her, Dad?
You're not a parent, buddy.
You can't understand.
People screw up.
Haven't you ever made a mistake?
Got scared and did the wrong thing?
It's not the same.
[up-tempo music playing]
♪ I'm floating away ♪
♪ My head is above the clouds ♪
♪ I'm blinking my eyes ♪
♪ I'm trying to find the right way to come back down ♪
♪ I can't see a thing ♪
♪ I can't see one thing ♪
Uh... I just wanted to make sure
you made it through the day in one piece.
[laughs] Thanks.
Weird day, huh? Yeah.
What's up?
It's just that I always thought
my mom would be the one constant in my life.
The one person I could always rely on, but I was wrong.
I know. It sucks.
No, there is one person
who's always been there for me.
I just can't believe I never saw it before now.
Who are you talking about?
Emmett.
Are you saying you're into him?
Yeah, I think I am.
♪ Dream a way for me to get my feet ♪
♪ On the ground ♪
What? Nothing.
Just...
Happy birthday.
And you, too.
♪ Dream a way ♪
[theme music playing]
Subtitles downloaded with "Netflix subtitle downloader" UserScript by Tithen-Firion.